What Parents are Saying

"Our son, Ryan, was diagnosed with Asperger’s when he was quite young—6, I believe—so he was so smart, but he struggled socially and with OCD. And when I say OCD, I mean extreme germ issues—touching anything or anyone was unbearable. He would wash his hands like a surgeon, and his showers were 1½ hours long.

 

We were told to allow him to perform these rituals at home because it was his safe space—where he could be himself. So we did that, while always trying to prepare him and help him see that he could function outside the house, and then always come home and “clean up” or be in his safe space.

 

Due to these problems, he was academically advanced in public school, but the school system had nothing to help him otherwise. And then we found GHCFE.

 

I remember the day we walked in to check out the school—it was the 2nd year they were open—and he said, “there is no way I can go to this hippie school!” My daughter, by the way, loved it from the minute we walked in. She loved the small class sizes, the no-shoe wearing, the friendly people, and the pet therapy.

 

We ended up enrolling our daughter immediately, but my son took about a month to convince. Once he started, he had no troubles academically, and the school even did whatever they could to advance his learning. He didn’t necessarily make friends, but no one was mean to him, and he was comfortable.

 

Tairi was always open to discussing his needs and would work to fulfill them. For example, my son would not speak to anyone in a store or go up to a cashier to pay for something, or go through a drive-thru and actually order something. So Tairi paired him with an intern (which is an incredible thing for children to have access to!) who would take him out—just the two of them—to go get a coffee and show him how to order it, and then sit down and talk, make eye contact with each other.

 

He loved those weekly outings. Sometimes they would go to a store, but it was always to help him function out in the world.

 

As his time progressed there, he would actually wear shorts or short sleeve shirts—which may sound ridiculous, but he never did that other places because he didn’t want any dirt or germs. He participated more, laughed, took music lessons, and eventually graduated high school from GHCFEE.

 

He was so proud, we were so proud, and the Grace family was proud of him. Please don’t think his depression or OCD magically disappeared—they were always there—but he now had two places that he considered “safe”—our home and his Grace home and family.

 

After graduation, when Tairi asked him to come back and be a T.A. for math and P.E., he was thrilled—honestly thrilled. He was able to work on the three days a week he wasn’t taking his college classes. And he truly loved his job—he almost never missed any work because he didn’t want to let his coworkers down or the kids—who thought he was awesome.

 

He and I would talk about our days and tell funny stories (we both work with kids), and he would always tell me that I needed to handle situations better. He knew—he was always calm and level-headed.

 

Those were the best two years of his life, and I say that because I got to experience life with my beautiful son, and I could see the joy in his face and stories. He laughed more and was so much more social. It brought him out of his shell, and he was an incredible human being.

 

Unfortunately, his depression was always still there, and we lost him recently to suicide. It is devastating and soul-shattering and heartbreaking. But we know we had him those beautiful extra two years due to his life, job, love, and family at Grace.

 

I am crying as I write this because I cannot ever thank Tairi and all the staff enough for giving me that extra time with my son and giving him some happiness in his life. I see pictures of him—posing, laughing, doing things I never would have thought he would do.

 

He had such tremendous respect and genuinely loved his coworkers, and to hear the things they say about him makes my heart proud.

 

Our family cannot thank Tairi and all of GHCFE for the incredible amount of love and support they have given us. The school and the family of staff and students deserve the best and need to be there to help and support all the other Ryans in the world.

 

It is a beautiful place that does beautiful things.

 

Some pictures of him at Grace—doing things that he would never have done anywhere else—such as being the bottom of a pyramid and letting people put shoes and knees and hands on him, or getting filthy at a color run event, or letting one of his students and friends give him a hug, or just sitting on the floor with his coworkers and smiling a truly happy smile.

 

I had never seen those pictures until recently, and the joy they give me lightens some of my pain.

 

I would also like to add a final bit of personal information. My son wrote a letter at the end, and in it he personally mentioned his Grace family because they mattered enough to him to say goodbye.

 

Thank you for your time,

 

Dena Schmidt

Proud mother of Ryan Schmidt

Proud member of the GHCFE family